Phoenix
Phoenix Nexus News Sub Space Static: Volume 5. Issue 4.
Sub Space Static: Volume 5. Issue 4.

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***** Inter Galactic News *****

Highlord Aadolf Loses Control As Dewiek Break Peace Treaty

Around one hundred DEN warships have launched an attack on a small GTT destroyer squadron of forty ships in the Daggern system. Two GTT ships were destroyed and another fifteen suffered noticeable damage. CEO Xavier Fox issued a restrained but angry statement demanding the DEN explain themselves. Highlord Aadolf’s buffoon-like response amounted to “Dewiek be Dewiek, let’s drink and forget about it.” Cold comfort for the dead crew onboard the GTT ships and their families. Especially, as seems likely at this time, the Empire will settle for some bloody money instead of retribution.



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Cover art by Ermione-de-Verne

Dewiek insiders tell the SSS that this action was unsanctioned and may have been the fault of unchecked battle orders onboard ships involved in earlier conflicts with the GTT. Echoing the Highlord's sentiment one source stated that "things can happen when spirits in the packs flow and should be quickly forgotten."

When asked for comment, Wolf Lord Greymane told us, "I gave no order to attack the GTT and the exact sequence of events is still being analysed. Whatever happens, it will be for the High Lord and High Council of the Nation to deal with and I have no further comment at time time as per their request."

The fact Dewiek bloodlust makes them untrustworthy peace partners probably surprises few of our readers. Regular readers will also know that Highlord Aadolf has had a tenuous grip on the packs for some time. His name on a piece of paper is probably worth less than his pet Kala’s promises not to meklanize prisoners captured by the Dewiek in battle. However, with the GTT still reorganising after Ike Krieger’s disastrous run, there’s little appetite to turn up the temperature. After all, a weak and pliant Highlord is best kept in place for as long as possible.

*** In Brief ***

There are rumours trickling out of the Caliphate periphery of the arrest of several Dewiek after making a public nuisance of themselves. Apparently chucking around guilders and boasting that you can drink anyone under the table does not go down quite as well as expected in one of the brotherhood churches. To be fair, with a large hall, high ceiling, stone floor for easy mopping, low levels of illumination and people on their knees bent over and mumbling (we have all been there after a heavy session), it was probably an easy mistake to make.

Tiberius Crowe has been busy covering up the IMP’s relations with Edward Lowe with a wash so white scientists at the electric sheep lab are envious. To save readers the absolute tedium of Crowe’s statement we summarise in song form:

Cu cuchoo came in and he caught me red-handed
Creeping with the Lowe next door
Picture this we were both butt naked
Banging on the IMP council floor
How could I forget that I had
Given Cu an extra key
All this time he was standing there
He never took his eyes off me

But he caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)
Saw me bangin' in the cruiser (It wasn't me)
I even had Lowe in the shower (It wasn't me)
He even caught me on camera (It wasn't me)


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In other Edward Lowe news, he has formed a new aff (not yet visible on the EEM register). No doubt to allow him further options in deniability as he switches between various flags to get around orders to the IMP fleet by one-storey Tiberius Crowe to shoot their own black ops ships. Confirmation that this was the motive behind the move came when the true Viceroy and Lowe puppet master, Jack Jones stated, “The AFA will be neutral to us as they have breached no laws in our space.”

It sure seems like a lot of trouble to go to for the FET except of course, the underlying threat of a HEX-FET alliance to the long term future of the Empire.

*** Public Notice ***

Greetings to all,

It is with great pleasure that I can finally confirm that a new era has dawned within the KRT.

With immediate effect, I have taken over the reins of this active clan of the Krell race.

The KRT was born with the Clan of the Black Rat, and had a fulfilling history. To this, I have decided to rename the clan in honour of the previous Warlord and my beliefs.

The KRT will now be known as: Krell of the Reverence Temple

As most of you are now aware, I am now, a devout follower of the True One, and the new KRT represents the religious side of the Krell.

To this, I have decided to forgo the title of Warlord, but have instead took the title of Holy Gorim.

As we are a very proud and loyal clan of the Krell, Namica is and will always be our Warlord of the KRT.

Presently, we are a small affiliation, but we do have high hopes and high dreams for the KRT, and we hope to fullfill this through peace and friendship.

Yours in the Faith

Kal Torak, Holy Gorim

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*** Public Notice ***

The Dewiek Elder Nation would like to issue a warning to all travellers.

It's Free Transit for the Honourable system charter has been updated (most notably in Solo system) due to the presence of a number of suspicious stealth scout ships patrolling the quads for several months.

These changes come about as part of it's recent investigations and attempts to clear its systems of pirate activity.

Free Transit for the Honourable

You may travel this system in peace – do so with honour.

Those the Nation deem to be spying will be posted and persistent offenders will see the whole affiliation added to the enemy list.

If you are in doubt contact the High Lord or the System Wolflord.

By the seal of the High Lord of the Nation.

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*** Letter to the Editor ***

Hello,

Thanks for including me in the SSS! It was a pleasant surprise.

My agent will contact you for the collection of royalties.

Keep up the nice work! Your publication is highly useful to help me figure out what the hell is going on in this universe.

Cheers
RGB

Editor’s response: Wow, a nice letter. I suspect the Boltzman Brain is trying to fool us.

*** Detnius Corner ***

I, Tarkelic quote:
‘Do you agree Tiberius Crowe is a sexy mother lover?’
Reads to me as uncouth
A lover can be a rough word indeed
Not sure what humor [sic] you are trying to present
but perhaps a reword to convey
your unaltered point
unless this is intended.
Scowl face, scowl face.

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*** Featured Blogs ***

Luthar Jenkins's Blog - Four Men Dead

The news from the Roger Waters couldn't have come at a worse time. Luthar found himself staring aimlessly out the portal of the Raven's Eye, repeatedly going over in his mind the news relayed by captain of the Roger Waters, ZaiÌm Qobadi - "Search for high pressure void failed. Explosive damage from ice debris caused significant damage. Four dead. --- END TRANSMISSION"

"Maybe I'm not cut out for this?", Luthar wondered. "Four dead... Four men dead."

A twinge of anger began steadily welling up from deep within. After all, he was trying to make a better future for all his employees and their families. His committal to the Galactic Trade & Transport company was supposed to begin this process. "But", he thought, "not for those four men."

Luthar couldn't recall a time when he felt this insecure. He's usually the happy-go-lucky hotshot that never lets a setback get him down. But these deaths had a different feel to them - "They died because I gave them this order", he muddled under his breath, unable to bring himself to say it out loud.

Resigned to his duties, he positioned himself behind his terminal and began writing condolence letters.

*** Affiliations ***

AFT Association of Free Traders (54) - Marion Tweedy
CIA Combined Intelligence Agency (64) - Laton CIA
DNA Displaced Natives Asylum (66) - Yahn Wodenzoon
DTR Detinus Republic (58) - Morley Decker
DEN Dewiek Elder Nation (67) - Aadolf
DOM Dominion (57) - bcd
ERC Eldar Rawk Conclave (83) - RAO
FCN Falconian Republic (70) - Crius Grimtail
FEA Felini Elamite Autonomy (60) - Kr'Shan
FEL Felini Tyranny (49) - Mrrshan
FLZ Flagritz Republic (47) - Kayxaer
FET Frontier Exploration & Trade (56) - Cu Chulainn
GRC Gracians (13) - HG1
GTT Galactic Trade & Transport (52) - Xavier Fox
GCE Garcia Enterprises (4) - Neil
HEX Hexamon (23) - Ando
IMP Imperial Services (51) - Tiberius Crowe
KRL Krell (30) - Namica
KRT Krell of the Reverence Temple (37) - Kal Torak
KST Kastor Kastorians (12) - Kastor
MZC Mizuchi Combine (86) - Mizuchi
MOH Mohache (73) - Listens
NLF Naplian Liberation Front (38) - NLFHQ
RCF The Red Confederate Forces - ???
RRH Roy Robert Holdings (39) - Roy Roberts
SMS Stellar Mining and Smelting (53) - MikhailM
USN Ulian Stellar Nation (34) - Oedipus Prime
WMB Wimble Nations (25) - zz

NPC / FoC: ARC, CIV, CGT, FRE, HBO, HEF, IND, ISP, JCN, MEK, MRC, PIR, PRV, TCA, TRN, KAS

Inactive: ANT, BHD, COD, HVE, IDC, RIP, SKW, TAG

Deceased: CAL, MIC

*** Submission ***

By private message to The Editor or via Mica if you prefer to remain anonymous.