Phoenix Nexus News Sub Space Static: Volume 3. Issue 11.
Sub Space Static: Volume 3. Issue 11.

***** Inter Galactic News *****

*** Stellar Empire On Warpath ***

The newly re-united Stellar Empire continued to wage war against the Flagritz Empire to bring about galactic peace and freedom for all. The latest system to fall to the inevitable tide of history was Morroglyph in the Coreward Arm. Dewiek intransigence reached fever pitch as the FLZ facilities changed to DEN paws and subsequently became targets of Imperial truth and justice. Despite putting themselves between the past and the future, the DEN seemed to lack much will for an actual fight with Dewiek military commanders adopting “meh” as their watchword.

Inside this issue of the SSS: * GTT smacks NLF * DEN whack MRC * Slaves Liberated * FLZ Retreat * ARC in Orion Spur * &etc

*** Empire Strikes Back ***

Frothing-at-the-bit Xav Krieger has declared a religious holiday for the Saint of Big-guys-giving-it-to-the-little-guy (aka Saint of the standard GTT contract) with a dose of good walloping for the Naplian Liberation Front. A mercenary outpost and Javelin-class destroyer were lost as Naplians joined the long list of aliens trying to make the exit from the Eternal Sunshine of the Stellar Empire.

A NLF spokes-naplian claimed it was “a minor inconvenience” and the captured outpost was taken from a pirate (honest), The NLF will continue to use PIR flagged ships “to allow us to target EMP positions in core systems."

*** Inky Legs It ***

Unfortunate SSS reporters have been swept up with the FLZ retreat from Morroglyph, claiming a wormhole appeared within the system and helped evacuate sizeable numbers of troops and goods back to the tentacled ones' Home Periphery before the wormhole closed unexpectedly.

Either our reporters were fed some hallucinogens or the FLZ really do have something capable of rapid wormhole generation.

*** Freedom For Slaves / Death for Everyone Else ***

Imperial stormstropper-in-chief Jenny Jones bellowed out the welcome news that hundreds, maybe thousands of slaves, had been rescued from former FLZ installations in Coreward for the mere price of tens of thousands of lives.

"Mangy cur" Magnus called out the Imperial’s new anti-slavery crusade as self-serving during a blue drunken rant before collapsing unconscious into a pool of his own filth. It also turned out, that Dewiek beliefs basically consist of telling other species where they can shove it.

*** A Merc by any other name ***

The Imperial zero-tolerance policy towards pirates, mercenaries and the like came to an end with speculation mounting that with nothing really to stop them, they may as well make use of these convenient flags to clear up the board without risking their sizeable stake.

*** What’s the anti-matter, hey? ***

Meanwhile, a Dewiek patrol of destroyers commanded by Fatty Fatty Lyceum Amaguk had it's nose bloodied by a slightly larger force of advanced MRC destroyers.

The DEN squadron came under diet-inducing fire from more than 350 antimatter missiles. All twelve DEN destroyers survived though two were obesely damaged. Ten of the MRC ships sustained shrivelling damage.

The DEN patrol had been nosing around the Arridian System when they were set upon by the MRC squadron. The MRC had the better of the first day, lobbing an impressive amount of antimatter at the DEN, before fleeing. As any Detinus senator knows and the MRC soon learned, never turn your back on a Dewiek. The MRC were soon made into mince meat.

*** Obelix of the Gods ***

Rumours have been circulating that the mysterious Architects are afoot in the Orion Spur. This remained unconfirmed by sources not usually stoned out of their gourds.

***** Periphery Classifieds *****

*** The Future Is Heavy ***

Big Daddy K is clearly bent on being the biggest Feline around by purchasing a copy of the massive Gravitational Manipulation technology. If you want to give this fat cat a bonus, get in touch.

*** Rathole Magic ***

Sneaky backstabber Warlord Namica is looking to purchase some Wormhole navigator and stabiliser blueprints. Is the cheeky little runtfather looking to open a wormhole right in the middle of Inversion during the next game of Krell Thermonuclear War? Clever ratty.

*** Wanted: SSS Columnists ***

We’re looking for columnists to help the Editors with regular columns along particular themes, for example tips for newbies or traders. If you’re interested please get in touch..

*** Submission and Anonymous Tips ***

Anonymous messages can be sent to our offices @ SSS Inter Galactic News HQ (39952).

Or you can submit stories in the usual way via Nexus.