Phoenix Nexus News Sub Space Static: Volume 2. Issue 32.
Sub Space Static: Volume 2. Issue 32.

***** Inter Galactic News *****

*** Message From The Editor ***

It seems like only yesterday that Kang was dropping napalm on a group of refugees fleeing from the latest ‘accidental’ orbital bombardment of a Starbase in Yank. You’d be surprised how easy it is to get away with that sort of thing when there are warships in orbit shooting things up. Nobody ever notices the Flagritz in the hover car with the napalm.

Which leads Kang to reflect that it has been such a long time since the last orbital bombardment of a Starbase.

But not so long since Kang last poured napalm onto refugees.

Which just goes to show you can never have too much of a good thing.

A good thing like more old news!

*** Sol Defence Fleet ***

The empire of humanity has established a Defence Fleet to protect their pitiful home system from ‘alien incursions’ under the leadership of the Dominion, who seem to have come some way from their old reputation as scruffy space-bikers, and are now protectors of humanity and financial powerbrokers of the universe.

Kang finds it all very depressing, and simply wishes for some vast alien invasion fleet to turn up from beyond the edges of space to teach these stinking meatsacks a lesson once and for all.

Just so long as they’re not flying ARC flags of course, those incompetent morons couldn’t successfully invade a wet paper bag.

*** Pirates Of Dorn ***

The pirate known to some as ‘Large’ or others as ‘That Dickbag’, has struck in the Dorn system where the pirate ship The Third Leg has successfully captured the FET freighter Exile 001.

Warships responded, attempting to intercept the pirate and it’s prey, but true to form That Dickbag was able to make good his escape with both bounty and fresh victims.

*** Nobles For Sale ***

As governments across the Peripheries are investing in Stuff to Make Things Better, a new class of Noble-For-Sale has arisen. Truly, you meatsacks stagger Kang.

Anyway, apparently it is now possible to buy the services of the nobility, and import them to your worlds, where, presumably, they will make things better for the common folks by hanging around eating canapés, purchasing gold-plated plant pots, and generating lots of tedious ‘meatsack interest’ stories in your local media about which duke is dating which duchess and how Kang wishes he could strangle you all with his mighty strangling-tentacle.

*** Kang Stupidity Award Of The Week ***

Congratulations to the meatsack known as Roy for landing a Broadsword on a planet with such high gravity that it was incapable of taking off again, or doing much of anything other than resembling a pancake.

*** Stop The Presses ***

Mona Luvsitt has bought new shoes.

This may be the first time a major political figure has bought a new pair of shoes since the Diaz Incident.

Kang hopes she survives these new shoes. As Mona is one of the few meatsacks Kang hates less.

***** Periphery Classifieds *****

*** Roy Will Carry That For You ***

Hello Customers

I have just started out looking for fame and fortune.
I have a few ships behind me all flagged FRE with the prefix RRH before there names.

I will be sending ships out on trade runs to build up the capital whilst explorers search for a suitable base.
If anyone as a base, planet etc lying around which fits our needs and would like it to be loved then you are more
happy to contact me with the details. In a few days I will take up a short stay residence till a base is found.
More on this later.

I will be studying the charts for systems and orbits where I am not welcome so they can be avoided.
If there are any areas where I would not be welcomed not marked please contact me so I can ensure
these are avoided as well.

Last but not least if you have any jobs from the mundane to the plane exciting let me know and I will
see if you can be accommodated.

Roy Roberts

*** Blueprint Wanted To Better Understand How To Blow Stuff Up ***


Looking for a Standard Structural Design principle, if you got one of those surpluss,
then contact me, so we can discuss a price!

Warlord Namica

***** Superior Flagritz Blog *****

Silith Ungol's Blog - Stardate 216.16.1 - Politics II
Stardate 216.16.1 - Politics II
Monday April 11th, 2016

The spawnling chamber was suffused by a freezing mist, exposed surfaces covered in a thin rime of varying patterns. Through the mist a juvenile flagritz drifted, pushed off by tentacles from a nearby surface. A second spawnling drifted lazily by, the antigravity in the chamber presenting a three dimensional arena through which over a dozen young flagritz drifted.

Lady Ungol was not one of the flagritz partaking of this recreation. Through the heated viewscreen she watched the spawnlings at play, enjoying their enjoyment and enthusiasm in this unique environment. Lady Ungol reflected on the course of events that had brought her here, the message relayed through her network of informants from a sycophant in the employ of the Archlord himself. The Cliriq were ever bothersome, their propensity for war matched only by their willingness to die in that theatre. Oh, but if anyone was to think she was ungrateful for this most inherently Cliriq mindset would be a singular disservice to her appreciation of her species. The Cliriq fought for the Empire and for the Flagritz race. They died for the Empire and the Flagritz race. All flagritz should be grateful for this willingness to sacrifice. It just needed to be correctly directed.

As well as war and death, the Cliriq were often prone to irrational violent outbursts. Typically, the greater the power wielded or the greater the freedom of expression afforded, the more likely, and severe, the reaction. This made the Archlord's recent pronouncement worrying.

Directing her attention back to the spawnlings she watched them for a couple of minutes. Two were tussling in the centre in a mock fight. There was no indication from their physiology as to their caste, they were immature, and their body would develop with adolescence, as would their minds. For now, they were simply spawnlings.

This fact made the Archlord's pronouncement more perplexing. That he could, or would, consider wiping out a third of the flagritz was extraordinary, to consider the destruction of a caste was pure hubris.

Lady Ungol hissed in amusement, remembering the Xenos exodus from the Empire over a generation back; a program of social engineering which left their planet of origin dominated by the Cliriq and Fessin for a generation. As for the exiles, they had found their nirvana and established a Xenos-only colony away from any alien or any other flagritz who would promote alien contact, be that for trade, dominance or destruction. A generation later and the Xenos found themselves controlling a colony where 30% of the populace were non-Xenos and united in a common goal, to break the shackles that bound them to isolationism. These active and dynamic young flagritz had welcomed the Empire and the old guard had fallen away in resignment that their exile was at an end.

The security brought by caste-immaturity safeguarded the race, without it the Flagritz species would no doubt have split and evolved into three separate species millenia ago. Perhaps only one would have survived...

Perhaps the Archlord was proposing something else, disguised under a veil of Caste persecution. Something less radical but personally no less destructive. There were steps that could be taken to safeguard the status quo. The 'Origin' programme was always an option if the worst happened. For now, a small amount of safeguarding would not go amiss.

With a last lingering look at the tumbling spawnlings, safe and secure in their caste-free youth, Lady Ungol deactivated the heat screen and turned away.